about me..

i like being spontaneous, but i don't like change. i talk to myself when i like something a lot. I'm a very jealous person but i don't show it. usually i only like one person for a very long time even if they are impossible to have. i don't wear my heart on my sleeve, but as soon as I'm alone the waterworks start. music is my life, it's crazy how 3 minutes can change your entire mood. i like taking baths, not showers... i guess watching IT so many times when i was little scarred me for life. when i need to tell someone something important, i have to write it down. it's a lot easier for me to express myself through writing. my favorite thing about anyone are their eyes, that's a deal breaker. i have a really bad temper that only my family has gotten the chance to witness. my favorite flower is a rose and i love red bull and rock stars. i like eating alone, i don't know why but people watching you when you eat creeps me out. i like keeping all aspects of life simple. even though some people say i am, i don't really find myself that pretty... except on rare occasions. my first love is softball, but i don't think anyone knows how much i would love to be beast at basketball. it's the only sport i can actually have fun with and not be too competitive. i feel most comfortable around people when we are playing sports, even if its just messing around. i have my own opinions and i hate it when people challenge them. i know what i want and when i want it, and people get on my nerves when they stand in my way. I'm very independent. i don't really rely on people that much, because i know they won't always be there for me. you have to look out for YOU. i love love, and i hate stereotypes and "isms" (sexism, racism, etc.) i believe every person, no matter what walk of life deserves equal rights. i don't see colors, i see personalities. i believe in life, which means i don't believe in abortion, or capital punishment. life is precious, and if your taking someones life, your making yourself god. religion is important to me. i really don't think i would be here today if i didn't have my faith, through all the bad times in my life, and my anxiety, i could always turn to god. . i have my weird things that i do. i love dancing. mostly when no one else is home so i can run through the whole house. i sing into the hairbrush and my favorite thing to wear is jeans and a t-shirt and going barefoot. I'm the extremes, i can be really shy or really outgoing. it just depends on who i am around. certain people intimidate me, but there really isn't a reason. i like spring, i love being warm, but i love the snow. the only thing i like about winter is coming inside from the snow and having hot chocolate with marshmallows, ha ha that's the only way you would get me out in the cold. i believe it's possible to love someone but to not like them, i also think you can like your friends more than your family, it's all about your values and beliefs, and who respects them. i have the weirdest laugh and never know when to stop because i "replay" things over and over in my head. i bite my lip and shake my leg when I'm nervous. I'm a master at lip-syncing and air guitar. i HATE knives, they scare me to death. when i see a lot of blood it either makes me want to get sick or pass out. i have a high tolerance for pain, and i can almost always hide what I'm really feeling. I'm a night person, i can stay up forever, but just don't mess with me in the morning...seriously. when I'm thinking about stuff i bite on my lip or nail, and when I'm bored or nervous i play with my hair or earring. i LOVE sweatpants!! If i could, i would wear them all the time, everywhere i go. i think about things too much and over-analyze everything people say...or don't say. going to the beach is my favorite thing to do in the summer, i even like it when your feet start to burn because the sand is so hot, it's an excuse to run into the water. i hate being alone and always want someone with me, i like talking without speaking... i love being able to just look at someone and know exactly what they want to say. i have an inside joke with EVERYONE. i don't like talking on the phone, and i hate small talk. if there was a phobia of small talk , i would have it. i hate being told I'm wrong when i know I'm right. i hate it when people avoid situations. be straight with me and either give me an answer or tell me you don't want to talk about it, I'll respect you a lot more. i have major trust issues, everyone I've ever spilled myself to has hurt me except for a very special few, and they know who they are. I'm very complicated, but I'll tell anyone anything they want to know about me. I've only ever loved two people, and one of them is now my best friend. i only eat the green, brown and blue M&Ms. the blue first, then the green, then the brown. i don't know why, that's just the way it is. i act tough, but really i hate drama, and i won't get into any unless it's completely necessary. for the most part, i love who i have become. no one can change me or my beliefs, this is who i am, take it or leave it.